The End of an Era

Another step...

Another drive across the states...

Another span of time spent in Wooster....

This time marks the end of an era.

The auction is Thursday.


1330 Barnes Drive

Soon this address will belong to someone not named Henderson or Siemens or Smith.
 
So why is this a stuggle?  I never lived in the house.   It should be easy to walk away from it, right?  I have no memories of 'my room' or 'the day of my wedding' or 'playing on the swings on the back yard' or 'getting on and off the bus in front of the house' or 'learning to drive' in this house or even this community.

But I do have memories of bringing Gary here, of bringing the girls to visit their grandparents.  I can still see Dad sitting in the Ugly Chair or in his chair back in the corner in the dining room.  Or Dad sitting in the recliner at the bottom of the stairs, watching tv.  I can still see Dad in the backyard with the girls, sitting on the bench and his standing by his horse on the engine with Hilary or standing in the garage with Megan and Hilary and all three of them wearing Navy shirts.  I can see him puttering around in the garage or walking around in the backyard, trimming and pruning and fussing around his raspberry bushes.

The things.  As we spent the better portion of the summer sifting through all of the 'stuff' that Mom had saved, we pitched so much, bagged up clothes for Goodwill, put bags and bags of trash in the dumpster, and looked at some items and just wondered 'why?'.  But there were some memories jarred and tears trickling down our cheeks plus good times from our childhood remembered.  We found our great-grandparents' marriage license and their deed to the farm, all of Mom's report cards, pictures of Grandpa that we didn't know existed, and many other treasures.

The bottom line is, and the common thread through everything I have written, is one word.  Memories.  We have those.  Nothing can take them away.  But also nothing can bring back that time period. It's gone.

As I talked to Kathy last night, as I have read emails and messages from friends, and as I have discussed this over and over with my patient husband, I know these things to be true.

A nice family will buy the house and begin their own set of memories there.  Other than the weeks when the kids were with us in the summer, there hasn't been fun, laughter, growth, or energy in the house for over 10 years.  The house will be made into a home for a wonderful family to enjoy, to live in, to celebrate.

The chattel.  (and I don't like that word at all)  All of it is just things.  Some of it will be hard to see auctioned to the highest bidder, but I have to remember that that bidder may want a piece of crystal or a certain bowl or the desk or a bed to use in his/her home and make memories with it.  Much better than my having it and storing it in a tub in the Quonset.  I bought the Jenny Lind bed in Megan's old room at an auction and we have used it for many years. Many memories - tucking the girls in at night.  Calming their fears during thunderstorms.  Now the grandkids sleeping in that bed.  Our own memories.

Yes it will be hard.  But I know that Gary will be with me every step of the way, just as he has been through the summer and through the cleaning out process.  I know that Hilary will be there for moral support and to keep me from crying too much.  I know that Megan will be thinking of me even though she can't be with us.  I know that my cousins will be joining us and possibly bidding on some items to keep Dad and Mom close to their hearts too.

Most of all I know that I have God walking beside me and keeping me calm as I take another step toward the finish line, then eventually closing the estate, the end of an era. 

1330 Barnes Drive will be the address of another family.  One that will create their own set of memories. 

And it will be ok.