Prayer Journal #3

 Do you need forgiveness on something?

Definitely.  I have been snapping at Gary the last few days and I shouldn't be.

Why have I been snapping?

Well, we are getting new flooring in the kitchen/dining room this coming week.  Everything needs to be moved out except the big island and the pantry.  This is the perfect opportunity, I think, to clean out the hutch and the Amish cabinet, sort through the little island and pitch some things, and clean out the fridge.  I have a process in my mind to follow when I plan something like that.

Unfortunately, my plan and Gary's plans are not the same. When I came downstairs yesterday morning, he had already pulled things off the top of the hutch, off the side shelves and put them in the garage.  He had moved the small shelving unit we have just inside the door for our keys and such, and I had wanted to go through that first.  So I was short tempered with him.  

As we worked through the hutch, he was helpful, but there was one instance where I bristled again.  Many years ago we had bought (or were given--I forget) some pasta bowls and a plate for bread.  We used them a few times and they were fun to use but as the years went by and the girls were small, we didn't use them as much.  Their place in the hutch moved to the back.  I found them again when we moved and thought we might use them again.  Maybe one time they made their way out of the hutch to the counter, but I really didn't enjoy using them. Plus two of them were chipped.  Time for them to go in the donation box.  Gary didn't want to put them in there.  He thought the bowl would be perfect for Tessa.  He could find a place for them somewhere in the kitchen.  When I said no to that because he is always 'finding a place' for something which invariably takes up a spot on a shelf that had been reserved for something else.  Then he said he would just put them on a shelf in the garage.  Well, how is that going to make them more accessible?  They went into the donation box.   

This morning when I came downstairs to watch online church he was moving things from the islands and the top of the fridge to the top of the table which is now in the living room.  Once again I bristled, so I returned to our bedroom to watch the service on my iPad.  He came after me and I returned to the living room. 

I am still in my pjs now but I feel more relaxed and will be ready to plow through the things on the table and sort this afternoon.  My frustration is gone.

First of all, not all husbands would be willing to help with this project.  Some would just sit in the chair and watch while their wives did all of the work. Some would make themselves busy doing other things.  Others would just flat out refuse.  My husband is willing and able to pitch in and help without my asking him to do so.  Secondly, I am SO thankful that my husband is here.  He has had two major health issues, three if we count COVID, since we have moved here.  Both of us have lost muscle tone and the ability to move around as well as we did when we first moved here.  Part of that is due to COVID, but part is due to our ages.  Several of my former colleagues and friends have lost their husbands and they are my age or younger.  I am so thankful that we are still both here and relatively healthy.

So I pray this morning for forgiveness and ask God to help me show my appreciation for all that Gary does for me and to help around the house.  I know he dislikes weed-eating but he knows that I like things to look neat so he was out Friday afternoon with the weedeater, doing his thing.  I am so thankful for him and how do I show my appreciation?  By being upset that he isn't doing whatever the way I want it to be done.  Shame on me.

Dear Lord, I know that I have not shown appreciation for all that Gary does to help me and to keep our home looking nice.  I ask you for forgiveness for my short temper and to help me back away from expecting everything to be done MY way. Thank you for all of the blessings you give to us, especially the financial means to have a new window and door installed last week and new flooring this week.  Thank you for our good fortune to find this house which if perfect for us.  Thank you for watching over us and keeping us safe and healthy.  In Jesus name I pray...Amen