It Didn't Work

I was trying so hard, probably too hard, to keep my blood pressure under control before the appointment this morning.

Relax, Beth.  Relax.  Think about other things.  Think about being with Cooper, Tessa, and Owen this afternoon and Landon later.  Think about the new baby.  Put a smile on your face.

I tried.  I really did.  

But it didn't work.

I walked into the nurse's office and when she first pumped up the cuff on my right arm, she frowned, pulled it off, and said 'Let's try the other one because it was a little high.'  

The left arm wasn't much better.  Still 155/110.

I sighed. I panicked.  Then we chatted about the changes in the pharmacy since Fagen's will be no more in Francesville.  CVS bought them, along with several other stores in northwest Indiana, and announced that several of the smaller sites would be closed in mid-September, including our local one.  Then we chatted a bit about her attending Ivy Tech in Logansport.  I felt myself relax.  

I asked if she could check it one more time.  She did.  140/90.  Better.  I know part of it I do to myself.  By the time we met Hilary, Blaine, and the kids for lunch, it was probably back to normal once again.  But I wasn't in the doctor's office anymore.

Later this afternoon my cell phone rang with a call from the cardiologist.  He is changing my medication, upping the dosage of one of the pills I take.

Earlier this spring I was gung ho on a new WOE, low carb/high fat.  The friends on Dotti's who were following this plan boasted that they were doing so well with the new healthy eating lifestyle that their BP meds were being reduced plus other meds were changing and they felt so much better.  That WOE was not for me---I missed the fruit and yogurt in the mornings and I can eat only so much bacon and eggs. But it makes me upset that the opposite is happening for me - increasing medication.  Boo.

I know what has happened.  And no.  I am not a doctor.  :)  

Too much food and not enough of the right kinds.  Eating out so much will do that.  Not making good choices will do that.  Stress eating will do that.  All of that is my fault.  I fell off the wagon with a thud and am now paying for it.

Not enough walking.  We have been super busy with cleaning out the house, preparing for the auction, staying with the kids, and some days I see my steps goal met. More often, though, the steps just aren't there because...well, it is hard to walk much when standing in a room and sorting through bags of pantyhose and 50 umbrellas and 130 bags of clothes to take to Goodwill. That's what I did most of the summer.

Sleep?  What is that?  Trying to sleep in a double bed is hard when one is used to queen size.  Sleeping on an airbed which loses air slowly is difficult too.  Listening for a child who may awaken in the middle of the night interrupts one's sleep, especially when we are in a strange house and we are responsible for said child.  One week I counted sleeping in 5 different beds in one week in 5 different places. I am teased often about falling asleep in the car, but I just can't help it.  I wake up in the middle of the night with my mind racing or thinking of things I need to do or trying to remember what is happening throughout the week and sleep eludes me.  But put me in a moving car and I am out like a light.

Food. Sleep. Movement.  Those three things, plus peace of mind, will help me lower my BP.  

I still will pick up the new dosage of meds tomorrow and start those.  I will work hard on the other three things.  Maybe when I return to the doctor in February there will be great improvement and I can go back to my original list of medications.  

Whatever I have been doing hasn't been working.  Time to take control and MAKE it work for me, right?