Jangled Nerves

Seriously...I just thought that I needed a pill or something to calm my nerves.

If it weren't just 10:30 in the morning, I would have grabbed a bottle of Snapple Diet Peach Tea, added a splurt of peach whiskey, and headed to the gazebo to sit and cry.

I usually don't feel this way, but today my nerves are shot.

Why?

Yes, I admit that every morning I wake up with a feeling of dread.  What news about the virus will I hear?  How scared will I become because of it?  Will I make the right decisions to keep myself and Gray safe?  Am I putting myself in danger by going to the fair today to watch Landon show goats....from a distance? 

Which news reports do I trust?  Which experts have the correct information?

Why do I feel like I am always wrong and having to defend myself ?  (that is a big one that bothers me)

Gary's doctor told him last week that the method of reporting numbers of cases by the CDC has changed.  When the virus started, if someone tested positive, the number was 1.  Now if a person tests positive, and that person lives in a house with five other people, the number reported will be 6, the person PLUS the five other people he/she lives with even though they haven't been tested and they might test negative if they were.  This came from Gary's doctor.   

This morning Hilary told me that Blaine had been told that after Vanderburg County, which is Evansville close to where I grew up, had a spike in number of cases after their fair opened recently.  She was concerned about our going to the fair this week and reminded us to take our masks with us.  She would have chairs set up where they were prepping the goats and we could stay there and go to the arena only to watch Landon show.  Since I was curious about this (and because I knew that the Vanderburg Co Fair was usually later in July -- always after ours on Posey County), I checked.  The fair board cancelled the fair in May and if it were to be held, the dates would be July 20-28 which hasn't even happened yet.  So that information was wrong, wherever it came from.

Are scare tactics being used to manipulate everyone?  Even with 'fact checking' how can anyone be certain that the information is actually true? 

Another thing that jangles my nerves is the arguments.  Differences of opinions that end up with one person saying that everyone has a right to his/her own opinion, it just happens that that opinion is wrong.  It happens with those that lean toward the liberal viewpoint; it happens with those who lean toward the conservative viewpoint.  It is happening.  It hurts.  Of course I have a right to my opinion; it's just that my opinion is wrong and I shouldn't hold that opinion and someone else can argue with me on why my opinion is not valid.  Why is it that what I think is so wrong?  Why is it that everything I listen to or read is the wrong information? 

A friend who is a county coroner and a mortician told us that there were directives to coroners and morticians that all deaths after the COVID virus began had to be listed as COVID deaths, whether they were or not.  Will someone argue with me if I shared that information?  A person who dies in a car accident of a broken neck still has to be listed as a COVID statistic, even if that had nothing to do with his death?   That just doesn't seem right to me.  But I am fairly sure I would be told I was wrong to have that opinion---based on factual information given to me from a source I trust.

Should I meet my friend for breakfast at Cracker Barrel tomorrow?  Is that too public?  Is there a stronger possibility we might pick up the virus there since it is along an interstate and travelers might have stopped there for breakfast?  Is this what I have to think about each and every time I make any type of decision now?

So jangled nerves.

I am telling you...if I weren't going to the fair today to watch Landon show his goats (with my face covering handy), I would be grabbing that bottle of Snapple Diet Peach Tea, with a splurt of peach whiskey, and sitting in the gazebo.