Progress!!!

A few days ago I wrote about my new 'word of the month' and the book I had found at Target in Port Charlotte.  I reviewed the section about social self-care yesterday after we came home and as I was unpacking the books from my bag.

Maybe it is hard to believe, but I am introverted often.  I like to be at home, I like to do my own thing, and I like to be with just Gary and the girls and the kids. 

I don't like to attend functions where I will feel uncomfortable.  I don't like to walk in and not know where I will sit or who I will talk to or how I will fit in.  I don't like it when I see people I know and they see me and look away or ignore me, which happens often.  I think that is why I liked being 'in charge' or a helper in some situations because the responsibilities gave me a purpose for being there and something to do which inhibited my ability to socialize which was fine with me.

So when I looked at the section of the book about social self-care, it scared me.  I know...I wrote about portions of the book which I liked, which spoke to me.  But it still scares me.  I always think that people will cancel or not accept an invitation because they don't like me.  Or that when I meet someone for the first time, they will be friendly for a while, but once they get to know me, they will realize that I am a dud.

Anyway....I was determined, kind of, to try to improve my social self-care.  Today an opportunity presented itself.

Jan Bailey invited me to her retirement reception at Ivy Tech on Thursday.

Now Jan was the first campus dean I had when I went to Ivy Tech in 2006.  She welcomed me to that group of instructors on the Logansport campus and made me feel at home there.  As we got to know each other, we both felt like we had met before.  We did the series of questions about our backgrounds and where we used to live and previous jobs and finally discovered that we had both lived in Blumberg Hall at Indiana State.  She was older than I, however, and was an RA when I was a freshman. RAs at the time worked the front desk and transferred calls to individual rooms from the switchboard (gee...that sounds really old!) and sorted the mail into individual room mailboxes.  She remembered my name, my maiden name, and me as well. Now I was totally unpopular, didn't receive many phone calls, and not much mail appeared in my mailbox so that in itself was an accomplishment, I felt.

Later Jan told me about the catering business that she and her husband owned and joked that if Megan, who was dating Matt then, was planning a wedding, to keep them in mind for the reception. As it turned out, their reception was at the canal in Delphi and Custom Select did  the catering which eliminated a lot of problems for us since they were familiar with the canal and had the necessary required licenses that were needed.  They also recommended cake bakers and other businesses that could help with our preparations.

Of course later we discovered that Custom Select, the business, was located in Pyrmont, which is where Hilary and Blaine found their dream house soon after Landon arrived in their family.    Because Jan and Darrell live close to Pyrmont and Rossville, several of their grandchildren attend Rossville schools and we have seen Jan at Grandparents Day a few times.

Lots of background, huh?

Anyway.....in the note that Jan sent, she said she remembered my sitting in her office after I had talked to Celestine about my own retirement.  She wanted me to share in her excitement about this next chapter in her life. AND she said that now we could get together for lunch or breakfast or just a cup of coffee (tea for me, of course) and have some fun outings. 

Now...my first thought was excitement.  Then my second thought was "I would like to go but I won't because I will be afraid to walk in by myself and if I see people I know they probably won't want to talk to me anyway so I just won't go."

That was the Beth I don't like to be and the one I am trying to push aside for the more social Beth.

I texted Barb and made arrangements with her to meet and go to the event together.  Then she told me that Phylliss was going to be there and another idea occurred to me.

Facebook messages to Rhonda and Phylliss about meeting for lunch that day, then going to the reception together.

And that is what we are going to do. 

Rhonda, Phylliss, and I will meet for lunch at Chili's, then go to campus and attend Jan's reception, meeting Barb just before it begins.

Sounds like a plan to me!

Lunch with two former colleagues.

Going to the reception with three former colleagues so I don't have to walk in by myself.

Good deal.

Plus I will enjoy visiting with everyone I haven't seen for the last four years.

And I can look forward to  future lunches with Jan after she retires!

As I said...sounds like a plan!

Progress!