Valentine's Day

No, I have never been a fan.

Why?  Lots of reasons.

I remember Dad never remembering to get anything for Mom when we lived in t. Vernon and sending me to the drugstore to get a box of candy for her (or driving me there and I went in to buy it) and she didn't like it because it made her fat.

I remember listening to the girls in my high school classes talk about the gifts they received from their boyfriends---and I didn't have a boyfriend so I couldn't chime in with anything I had received.

Move on to college and living in the dorm.  Walking through the lobby on Valentine's Day was similar to either visiting a florist, a hospital room, or a funeral home.  Flowers everywhere, waiting for the recipients to retrieve them after classes.  There would be either a phone calls ("Flowers at the front desk for....") or a note in one's mailbox ("Please pick up a package at the front desk") but only once did I receive one of those.

Next - years at West Central.  Some of the same feelings with flower deliveries.  But the big thing was the delivery of cookies, candies, and flowers as a fundraiser for a club ---- and that club originally was mine.  It was a lot of work, it was a great fundraiser for us, but it was overwhelming so it moved on to another organization which is when the sadness moved in.

I watched when deliveries were made.  Some students received a couple of flowers or a cookie or two.  Some received a large pile (and were embarrassed), and many received nothing at all and were miserable.  Maybe it didn't really matter to them, but it is hard to sit there and watch  others walk up and down the aisles with cookies and flowers and receive nothing.  Not. One. Thing.  Yep.  Look at me.  No one cared enough about me to buy me a lousy cookie.  (I heard a student say that one time).

The sale also moved to the elementary school which created a similar problem.  How is it explained to kindergarten children that some of the other students are receiving cookies and candies and flowers but they are not?  Then there are the ones who receive a stack of cookies and a bouquet of flowers....  Often the classroom teacher would order enough cookies and flowers so that everyone in the class received something during the delivery. Just so no one felt left out

That's my problem ---  feeling left out or others being made to feel like they are left out.

One year my juniors were talking about things they missed from the elementary and the Valentine's Day parties were mentioned.  Finally I suggested that if they wanted to, they could make Valentine pocket envelopes from construction paper and decorate them, put them on the back bulletin board in my classroom, and fill them with Valentines, then have a party on Feb. 14.  They became like giddy elementary students!  I brought in construction paper and pulled out my tubs of markers.  Some students brought in ribbons and glitter and stickers to share.  One class started the trend; the others followed.  My only rule was that if a student participated, then he or she would give a Valentine to EVERY student in the class, not just a few.  NO ONE would be left out or forgotten.  Each class planned a party which included refreshments and a few games.  They would come in before school or between classes or sometimes after school and secretly place their Valentines in the packets on the bulletin board.  It was great fun and the way Valentine's Day was supposed to be!

Another year my Honors classes made Valentines for their mothers or grandmothers or fathers or aunts.  I received several nice notes from mothers, thanking me for assigning this project for my students.  Many had not received a card or a gift from their child for several years.   The sad thing I remember about this activity is that Deb died just before Valentine's Day.  Kacie put the Valentine she made for her mom in the casket with her.

But I have a husband, you might remind me. I have daughters too.  And through the years we have given and received gifts.  Gary sent me flowers several years at school.  And while I appreciated all of the gifts, there was still the memory of how hurt some are to receive nothing.

This year was rather low key.  We did some shopping at Target for the kiddos.  Legos for Landon and Cooper, bigger blocks for Owen.  Clothes for everyone but Landon. Some candy.  Packs of mini-muffins.  It was cool to watch Landon and Tessa open their cards and sit and read them.

Valentine's Day - not a fan.  I am more of a 'show them you love them all the time'  rather than just on a special day.  

Now the next one?  St. Patrick's Day?  Now THAT is one holiday I love.

JK